As Neil Sedaka so eloquently puts it, “Breakin’ Up is Hard to Do”, but when you have children, the break up can be even more painful and difficult to deal with.
Life carries on; you continue to work, manage the school runs, do the household chores and occasionally have some time for yourself.
After a break up, you have to balance single parenthood and all the demands and time constraints that can bring together with fitting in your child’s never ending party invites and activities.
Added into this mix is the continuing relationship that you have to maintain with your ex partner or spouse “for the sake of the children”.
And this can be the hard part for any person dealing with the aftermath of a breakdown, whether weeks, months or years later. But the key is communication. I find that this is the one area that separated parents struggle the most with on separation. Emotions can still be raw or the break up has been difficult and contact with the other parent needs to be limited.
Before the days of modern technology, as a family solicitor I would regularly advocate the use of a “communication book” – a little book that went with the child to each parent and enabled the parent to update the other parent on any problems, health issues, dietary needs etc.
Now in the 21st Century, “ParentPlan” has been introduced to help parents communicate effectively with each other and other relatives / carers, such as grandparents. It is a secure website created by parents for parents. It allows parents or carers to share photos, events, contact details, post key event reminders and is a modern tool to help busy parents manage separation and the care of their children.
ParentPlan is a new service and is offering a free trial until 01 June 2015. It can be accessed at www.parentplan.com .
Separated parents need to recognise that need to continue speaking and communicating to the other parent for the benefit of their children for the years ahead. It doesn’t end when the child becomes 18!
At Farleys, we can offer advice and guidance on resolving arrangements for your children, or any other family law issues that you may have. Just contact us for more information.